My first workout felt like a long long joke with a weak punch line. Mainly because I followed the plan. And the plan requires a warm up which, in my case, will be 4 times longer then the actual work out.
A fitness expert once explained to me in detail why warming up before exercise is so important. Especially when you are over 30 (or way over thirty), overweight (or way over weight) and have joint or other physical issues (BFG issues supercenter, how may I direct your call?). I wont bore you with the technical stuff but anecdotally, I tried to short cut the warm up in the past and ended up on the couch with both knees in soft casts packed in ice. So I am a believer.
A fitness expert once explained to me in detail why warming up before exercise is so important. Especially when you are over 30 (or way over thirty), overweight (or way over weight) and have joint or other physical issues (BFG issues supercenter, how may I direct your call?). I wont bore you with the technical stuff but anecdotally, I tried to short cut the warm up in the past and ended up on the couch with both knees in soft casts packed in ice. So I am a believer.
The rule is always warm up for 30 seconds for every year you are old. For me at 48 (for a few more days at least) I need to warm up for a minimum of 24 minutes. 24 minutes!?!.....
But not a problem for this BFG, humbled by pervious injury. Now a days I'm Joe Compliance and the rules are my friend. All that being said I got on the Lifestyle Fittness professional grade treadmill, entered my info, set the system to manual and cranked it up to the blistering pace of 2 mph proped my tablet in the ledge so it covered the display and set off to walk for 24 minutes.
A word about top of the line treadmills. They ask for your age and weight. Weight so you can get an accurate calorie count and age so the system can set the aerobic heart rate you need to reach for maximum effect. There are pulse rate sensors in the hand rails to constanty monitor and adjust.
But I choose manual, so I can adjust the speed and incline myself.
Of course I played with the pace a bit and fiddled with the incline but never too fast or too steep. I was reading a book which hid the treadmill display and when I was sure the 24 minutes was surely up, I'd check the time. 4 minutes. Doh!
So I read a chapter and tried not to think about the time. I was feeling better and getting loose. I swung my arms and stretched and walked. Now got to be done. 17 mins!
I was so anxious to have it over so I could run.... or at least jog... so I forgot the book and watched the time and when it hit 24 I paused the machine got off and streched and jumped back on ready to run!
But not a problem for this BFG, humbled by pervious injury. Now a days I'm Joe Compliance and the rules are my friend. All that being said I got on the Lifestyle Fittness professional grade treadmill, entered my info, set the system to manual and cranked it up to the blistering pace of 2 mph proped my tablet in the ledge so it covered the display and set off to walk for 24 minutes.
A word about top of the line treadmills. They ask for your age and weight. Weight so you can get an accurate calorie count and age so the system can set the aerobic heart rate you need to reach for maximum effect. There are pulse rate sensors in the hand rails to constanty monitor and adjust.
But I choose manual, so I can adjust the speed and incline myself.
Of course I played with the pace a bit and fiddled with the incline but never too fast or too steep. I was reading a book which hid the treadmill display and when I was sure the 24 minutes was surely up, I'd check the time. 4 minutes. Doh!
So I read a chapter and tried not to think about the time. I was feeling better and getting loose. I swung my arms and stretched and walked. Now got to be done. 17 mins!
I was so anxious to have it over so I could run.... or at least jog... so I forgot the book and watched the time and when it hit 24 I paused the machine got off and streched and jumped back on ready to run!
I had no specific plan so I began to negotiate the run portion in my head. I had walked .75 miles during the warm up so I figured I'll run the last 1/4 mile and then cool off for a few minutes. Surely I can run/jog 220 yards. I'm setting a reasonable goal I'm sure. So what its my first time in years and I'm old and fat; I'm all warmed up, all streched out and I used to be an athlete. So I crank the treadmill up to 4 mph and get the huge slab o' man that is my current self in motion.
OMG! I'm instantly out of breath, everything is in distress. Knees scream, back answers back with howls I last all of 20 seconds at 4 mph and take it down to 3.8 mph, I steal a look at the distance display thinking I must be close to a 1/4 mile I gotta be... it reads .78
I've traveled 3/100th of a mile since starting to jog. The meter clicks to .79 I start to gasp. The nurse on duty for the cardiac patients gives me a cautionary look, I fake a brave smile and take it down a notch to 3.5 MPH. I quickly justify a renegotiation of the distance goal to .15 miles. If I can make it to .90 miles I can go back to a walk. I lumbered and puffed and watched the agonazilingly slow distance display click forward. At .90 I went back to a walk.
In just a few seconds I was alright. Not light headed, not wheezing, no torn or strained anything. I'm spent but I'm intact. I walked the whole recommended 5 minute cool down. Here's the final result:
I warmed up for 24 minutes, "jogged" for 6 and cooled down for 5. A total of 1.24 miles traveled in 35 minutes. The good news is I can only go up from here.
I have to admit I am amazed how far I've fallen but I have 13 months to get from 1.24 to 13.1.
Oh and the punch line in the title? Here's the joke. It's one you can emblish for an hour if you like but the outline is:
Farmer 1: Why does your pig have a wooden leg?
Farmer 2: Well when my barn caught on fire that pig saved my life
Farmer 1: Why does your pig have a wooden leg?
Farmer 2: Well when I was caught in that flood that pig saved my life
Farmer 1: Why does your pig have a wooden leg?
Farmer 2: Well when I got caught in that twister that pig saved my life
Farmer 1: Why does your pig have a wooden leg?
Farmer 2: Well thats a special pig, you don't eat a pig like that all at once.
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