Extra Extra Extra Extra Extra Large

The biggest size I ever bought was a 5X-L.  At my top weight (335lbs) in 2005.  It was a t-shirt from, where else, Walmart.  It actually fit nicely.  It was one of the many last straws.

America loves them "Extra Large".  'cause that's 'merica man!  We like everything writ extree large!

In my case it was writ extra, extra, extra, extra, extra large.  That's crazy.  What

must the 97lb garment sweat shop workers think?  But to be fair my usual size was only extra extra extra large.  Extra extra extra large is conveniently annotated at Walmart by a black plastic ring on the neck of the hanger.   I drifted between extra extra large and extra extra extra large most of my adult life.



Quick Wally World shopping tip:  

All the sizes are color coated to make stocking and shopping easier in a universal language, color.  But still check the size on the garment, you cant trust that the right shirt got on the right hanger.  Thank you for shopping at Wal*Mart!

I was lust looking at myself in the mirror in my current Extra Large (still a little snug but not like a sausage casing) and thinking about "extra large".

With an acronym (or color code) for my size I never really thought about what XXX-L meant; Extra, extra, extra large.

Me: I like this shirt do you have it in my size?
Clerk:  Wonderful sir! What size do you need? We have pre-made men's sizes in small, medium and large.
Me: I guess a large, I'm pretty big
Clerk: Here's the large.... oh my, this is not quite going to work...
Me: Do you maybe have an Extra large?
Clerk: Lets see, Yes! ....No....Still not big enough.
Me: What about an extra, extra large?
Clerk: here's one....almost
Me: Extra, Extra, Extra Large?
Clerk: Here ya go sir.  I'm afraid I'll have to charge you a little extra for the extra, extra, extra large size.
Me: WHAT!?  What a rip off!

I never had to think about being extra, extra, extra large.  I did often get a twinge of shame buying clothes.  I would think that the sizing was silly at this point and America should make XXX-L the new Large.  Actually I've given this some thought.  Here is my proposed size translator to reflect the average sizes in America.

5XL = 2XL
4XL = XL
3XL= L
2XL = M
XL = S
L = XS
M = XXS
S = XXXS
XS = XXXXS

We'll have to work out the corresponding number sizes for women but every body wins!  Us on the plus size (great euphemism BTW), get scaled down.  Skinny people get even smaller.  The Mia/Ana chicks will LOVE it!  "I need a size negative 16, please"

Extra large today; I'll be in a large by the end of summer, in a medium by the time I hit the water for Iron Man April 2014.

 Nothing I currently own will fit except a tuxedo, two dress shirts and one suit.  I'll need to find out what color tag Walmart uses for "large", maybe even medium.  Weird to think that my actual size is probably a medium.  I'm not a "Big" guy as I always thought.  I'm a slim guy in a fat suit and the suit is coming off.

I'll be having a big yard sale end of summer, both online and live.  Clean out the closet and get ready for the new wardrobe, size M.